Why I Will Always Leave This Fragile Heart Open

Whether you are aware of it or not, the spring season is a time of transformation.
Spring comes with change, evolution, and rebirth.  

When difficult changes enter our lives,  it never leaves us untouched.  It often hurts, and sometimes it hurts so badly that we feel as though our heart can no longer bear the pain. The heart can shrink, it can break, and sometimes it can feel like it will stop to end it all.

Through times of change, we often start to wonder if any of this has a deeper meaning in our lives.

I constantly ask the Self this same exact question through times of confusion, but I have often been left with no answer.

With change, we may experience a feeling of inner emptiness and it’s up to us to choose what to do with it: Do we choose to fill that emptiness with whatever that passes by to cover up the pain, or do we observe, stay open, and allow ourselves to live through that emptiness to welcome this new area of spaciousness?

I have decided to choose the second option, day after day.

I have kept my heart closed for a long time because it seemed that doing so could protect me from the pain. But eventually through times of change, I realized that I was not living in the Truth- because the pain was always still there, I just couldn’t perceive it, and I was not aware of its hidden presence. And as soon as the rock firmly guarding my heart started to crack a little, the pain seeped quickly to my consciousness like a sudden flood.

Despite this heavy emotional release, in the meantime, life passed on quietly, I suppose for the bad and for the good.

For me, it is not easy to live through life with an open heart. This fragile and sensitive heart begs me constantly not to feel everything so intensely and to give it a rest.  It tries to convince me in every possible way that it would be better to hide itself once again.

Keeping the heart open is a constant struggle.
But it’s worth it, to live in the Truth.

I may be in pain, but I will bravely embrace this state until my soul one day fulfilled its need of gaining all the knowledge and experiences life has to offer.

I will always keep my heart open and it will never remain closed.   By doing so, not only would I open myself to deeply experience both the good and the bad, but I am choosing to open myself to Life.

What do YOU choose?

Written By:  Eleonora Cosner
Eleonora is a Yoga Teacher (200 RYT, RPYT) who lives at the border between Tuscany and Umbria, in the heart of Italy.  She calls herself an #earthandsoulwanderer, due to her love for traveling and soul wandering.  She is a multipotentialite and a polyglot (she fluently speaks Italian, English, French and Spanish).  When she is not teaching yoga or working on her laptop, she loves wandering in the woods, devouring books and engaging in deep conversations with her loved ones.