Slowly mending and being relegated to rest has given me a lot of time to think. I finally had the chance to reflect on my life the past few months and realized a few important things.
I love my job. I love being busy. As a result, I was caught up in the rush and pull of what I love. I let the passion for my vocation move me at a dangerous pace.
I pushed my limits.
This realization has been punctuated by the myriad of “New year, new you” messages bombarding news feeds at the moment, many of which encourage us to “push the limits” or “go beyond your boundaries”.
This is partly my fatigue talking, but I just want to give these messages a big old “f*ck off”.
I agree that life begins outside of the comfort zone, and yes, sometimes we need to try new things or conquer fears. These are all good practices.
However, if this means sacrificing health and balance in life, then I encourage you to join me in flipping these messages the bird.
Pushing boundaries does not always mean going beyond our physical limitations. Personally, forward momentum is hardly in short supply. If anything, the most challenging thing for people like me is sitting still.
Sitting still with my own thoughts and dealing with sh*t I’ve pushed aside because I’m afraid it will hurt too much, take too long to solve, or worst of all never, resolve itself, is where the challenge truly resides.
Devoting time, energy and faith to the healing process of the mind and soul is the most daunting yet rewarding workout of my life.
Turns out, a killer six pack isn’t going to fix the emotional wounding that happened when you were five.
If you’re like me, you choose to run hoping the issues you’re dealing with will be left behind. Sometimes, during this temporary escape, the mind has a chance to slowly chip away at the inner issues. Things start to get sorted out amongst all our comings and goings. Unfortunately, because we are running, the energy needed in order to effectively deal with our issues can’t be fully given. It’s at times like this I recall the phrase;
“Wherever you go, there you are”
We can run the farthest race. We can climb the highest mountain. We can swim the deepest sea. It makes no difference. Whatever baggage we have inside, if we haven’t dealt with it, we’ve checked it in our overhead compartment and it’s along for the ride.
Luckily, the asana, or physical practice of yoga is done to achieve stillness. Its goal is to allow the practitioner to build enough stamina so they might endure sitting and meditating for long periods of time. This is something I am continuously learning. It is painfully humbling, yet startlingly beautiful. The more I enter into stillness, (either of my own volition or by forced circumstances) the more peace I find- patiently waiting for me.
I have chosen to push my limits-the limits I have placed on myself inside.
The world outside can wait.
Written By: Written By: Jelayna Da Silva
Jelayna is a well certified, passionate yoga teacher and writer living in downtown Toronto. Her love for yoga takes her across the GTA to teach at several studios and to multiple clients. With a background in Psychology and College Athletics she infuses her classes and writing with mental and physical awareness, not to mention a healthy sense of humor. Whether leading at a large outdoor events, in a classroom, or in the home of a client her philosophy for teaching is simple - teach with love, empathy, patience and humility. Yoga is a journey, not a destination. www.jelaynayoga.com